Posts Tagged ‘love’
One thing I know for sure is when I’m consciously creating my life, my relationships and my career, I get results.
So why am I not always doing that, and what am I doing instead? The truth is, I’m probably defaulting to the bad place. As much I want to hide the truth from you…I won’t, because BANT (Bare Ass Naked Truth), while typically uncomfortable, is damn near always full of opportunities for awareness and breakthroughs. And that’s what I signed up for.
Now back to default. We all have it, and for most of us it’s usually not pretty. Typically stewed in self-doubt, our default presents in many forms. For me, it was all about judging and no one was off limits, especially moi. I’ve judged myself for working too much, and then again for taking time off. I judged myself for ending my marriage, as well as for staying in it too long. I judged myself for judging myself. I even caught myself realizing this silly loop, having a good laugh and then jokingly thinking, “Look at you, judging yourself for judging yourself…dumbass.” Damn, I did it again! That’s 3 layers deep. Often cloaked in humor and seemingly harmless self-deprecation, my default was sneakier than I thought.
I decided I was in need of a little tune up. I could see that when I wasn’t intentionally holding the steering wheel (in my life), I had an automatic pull toward self-doubt. It was like my alignment was off and I was inadvertently veering in a direction I didn’t really want to go. For me, a tune up came in the form of hypnosis. It was the perfect way for me to get back on track. Whether we are looking to sharpen our awareness, shift our default or dump a bad habit, it all comes down to CHANGING YOUR MIND, and what better way than from the inside out?
I’m pretty sure I’ll still visit the bad place from time to time. In fact, I caught myself judging this post more than once. Judging was a part of what I did for so long, however, now I can catch it sooner and come back quicker.
I want to hear your story. Leave your comment below or contact me @ email@example.com.
To love with abandon is to give up loving in a smaller safer way, in favor of loving fully. Loving small doesn’t really protect us, it just keeps out relationships limited. To love w/abandon allows you not only to fully love, but to fully BE loved.
It’s true, there’s always an opportunity to be in a funk, to feel insecure, to question ourselves. But sometimes, just knowing that is enough to keep it temporary so that we can get back to being our best selves!
Because many of us have a rather strong aversion to failure, we’ve done our best to avoid it. Unfortunately, the most reliable way to side step failure is to play small. We do it in how we present ourselves to the world, in our careers and businesses and in our intimate relationships. But eventually we realize that protecting ourselves from failure only keeps things unfulfilling and predictable.
I did it. And I got very good at being average. I only skied the bunny slopes, took unchallenging classes in school, and dated down. It was a good plan, until it wasn’t anymore. Ultimately there’s no real glory in the wins when you already know you can do it without really trying. It’s like winning a game of chess against your cat.
If you can relate, consider doing it differently. Dare to suck. Become a little more courageous and a bit experimental. By giving yourself permission to fail, you actually give yourself permission to soar. We just don’t know it until we try!
Intimacy issues? Reignite passion by getting your limerence on. Limerence is that period of the relationship where everything is easy and you can’t stop thinking about each other. Learn how to get back to that level of interest and connection with your significant other TODAY!
Naked Talk Radio – That is!
WKRP Radio is finally launching my new daily talk show, Naked Talk Radio. Get naked with me every weekday at 11am PT/2pm ET as we strip away the myths and misconceptions about Relationships, Dating & Love. You can call in to the show @ 877.699.4662 or, if your a little shy send an email to elaina@NakedTalkRadio.com and I’ll answer your anonymous questions on air. Don’t miss this edgy and engaging event that is sure will keep you laughing while learning. If you like Dr. Laura, you’re going to hate this show!
N a k e d T a l k R a d i o
Monday – Friday @ 11am PT/2pm ET
Listen from anywhere @ WKRPradio.com
Learn how quickly games like Truth or Dare, Would You Rather, and Two Truths and a Lie can heat things up in your relationship.
Today is election day in the states and it got me thinking…Aren’t relationships an awful lot like holding an elected position? Think about it, we’re kind of “campaigning” when we are dating. We make promises (literal or implied) about how things will be different if they “elect” us. We often share only our best self. We introduce “the voter” to our enthusiastic “supporters” (friends) who confirm why we are the best “candidate” (look, it even has “date” in the word, lol).
And by the way, I’m not suggesting that campaigning is wrong - in either case. It’s a natural way to be chosen. However, I think far too often (also in either case) disappointment and frustration can occur when there is an absence of follow through once elected. If the promises were not honored after the win, then the voter is left feeling bamboozled and manipulated.
So, when campaigning for the office known as Significant Other, be real! Make promises you know you can keep. And if you’re already an elected official, revisit the promises you made during the last campaign and ask yourself if you are fulfilling them so that you may continue to get the vote.