Are you that real?  Are you, really?  If you had asked me a couple years ago, I’d have told you I was honest.  That I operated with integrity and spoke the truth.  And I did.  Well, mostly.  I guess sometimes that piece of truth that was really uncomfortable “accidentally” got left out.  The short story, if you will.  I wasn’t lying, but I wasn’t bare ass naked.

Bare ass naked truth is an advanced place of truth.  It’s about owning the what is.  The good, the bad and the ugly.  And then finding self acceptance in the underbelly of your secret, private ick.  Standing, exposed and naked under the florescent lights and unabashedly declaring, “This is me!”.  It’s scary!  Yes.  And it is fabulous, too!  When you can create the space for that degree of honesty and love for yourself, you can begin to bring that into your relationship and arrive at a whole new level of connection.

It can very liberating to discover that authenticity and acceptance are available to you.  And better yet, at the same time!  However, you must know that  BANT requires permission and comes with a warning label.  “Trying this at home without mutual consent and agreement can lead to injury“. Truth is, not everyone wants, or is capable of such a thing.  It is imperative that it be embraced by both parties in order to truly contribute to the relationship.

So, are you ready to take it on?  Does it excite you?  Scare you?  Intrigue you?  How bare ass naked are you really willing to be?

No, I’m not talking about that!  Although, that can be powerful too. I’m talking about loving the essence of who you are. You at your best…or not. Sure, we can (and will) always evolve and strive to be better. And that’s important, too. But how about loving the whole package, right now? Not when you’re more patient. Not when you lose 20 pounds. Not “someday”. But right now!  It’s not about loving the good and ignoring the rest, but rather loving all the parts that make up who you are. If we are all here to learn anyway, maybe it’s okay that we don’t always have all the answers. Maybe fumbling through is part of the adventure. So why are we so quick to hide our flaws and cover up our issues? It’s not like anyone here is perfect. Just another soul muddling through, trying to figure it all out.

I can’t stop wondering how many of my own mistakes, failures and life lessons were overshadowed by my commitment to keep them on the down low.  And how powerful it could be if I were to funnel my energy into allowing those “opportunities” to contribute to me, rather than embarrass me. Maybe the most honest way to improve our relationships is to begin with our self. Isn’t it time to own who you are, the great, the not so great, and all the stuff in between? When we can learn to accept our own imperfections, then maybe we can be more accepting of others, including our partners.

“Be forgiving of your own evolution.”   ~Gandhi